Match Report
Derby Ams (1) v Pastures FC (3)
| Player | Rating | ||
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Adam Blackburn | 5 | |
| 2 | James Derbyshire | 5 | |
| 4 | Richard Swain | 5 | |
| 5 | Andrew Singleton | 6 | |
| 6 | Ady Colley | 6 | |
| 8 | Carl Whittaker | 6 |   |
| 9 | Sam Marshall | 7 |  |
| 10 | Grant Strickson | 6 | |
| 12 | Adam Morris | 6 |
Date: 08/12/07
Team: 1sts
Match Type: Cup
Venue: Home
Opposition: Pastures FC
Team: 1sts
Match Type: Cup
Venue: Home
Opposition: Pastures FC
Hello sport fans. This day in 1980, rockstar John Lennon was shot dead in New York. A verse of ‘I am the walrus’ was sung the night before in Dibbsys mums bedroom in honour of the legend. Also on this day Sinead O’Connor was 41 years young. It’s been seven hours and fifteen days since Friday 23rd November, 6.30am.
Despite the Mighty Ams faithful following (Dick) demanding we adopt a more seasonal, festive formation of the ‘Christmas Tree,’ we continued our usual attacking formation of 1-9. Our starting line up was changed at the last minute due to a drop out (not Ady, although he is!) Swainey had to fill in at sweeper with Snakes and Dibbsy as marker pens. In midfield we had the Singo holding with Green and Carl – the appendix – Whittaker in front of him. Starring on the wings were Kelvin and Twedds with guest appearances of Marshall and Granty upfront. On the bench was ‘Adam Morris’ and ‘Paul Sheffield’, although Morris was unable to run the lines due to cold hands.
The match got underway and in the first ten minutes they had struck the crossbar following an unmarked header in the box that fortunately didn’t fall at the feet of an opposing player or Dibbsy. In the next five minutes they had brought the best out of our keeper. A square ball across goal to the back post was met with a forceful downwards header which was saved by the feet of our keeper pushing the ball onto the upright after scrambling across goal, and, once again, the ball broke kindly to us away from harm.
Despite actions that resembled ‘The Alamo’ in our goalmouth, it was actually us that scored first. After a clever short throw into Adys feet he miss-controlled the ball, in an attempt to retain possession he outstretched his leg when suddenly a gust of wind rolled down the pitch picking up leaves and grass as it picked up pace, by the time it had ‘hit’ Ady it was travelling anywhere in the region of fast crawl to slow walk. This was enough; Ady went down and was, quite amazingly, judged to have been fouled from behind. Whittaker converted the penalty sending the keeper the wrong way. 1-0.
They had soon pulled level. The ball had worked its way to their left-winger, Freddie Mercury, his shot towards goal which our keeper had covered was deflected by Bradders who attempted to block and lofted over our helpless goal keeper. You cant blame Bradders though as he made a genuine attempt to stop the ball. 1-1.
Before the end of the first half they were one better than us as a team. Once again Freddie was running towards goal, crossed the ball in between our keepers legs low and hard to which their striker slotted home from two yards. This goal was definitely not my fault. I couldn’t have stopped the goal in any way! 1-2.
Half time arrived and we knew that we were the worst team on the pitch and were playing some of the worst football we had played all season. No changes were made, but the subs were told to keep warm in case of a new ice age or more unlikely, they were required to play. Thinking about it, I may have been able to prevent their second goal but it would have taken a very smart save to stop the ball going in.
In the second half we had to get off to a good start to try and get ourselves back in the game, but couldn’t manage to get any sort of rhythm going. The pitch was getting more and more cut-up and the football started getting more and more ‘long ball’ esq. That in conjunction with our keeper who probably should have saved their second goal meant that the last forty-five of the game were going to be scrappy at best.
Our keeper did make another good save in the second half, which was later described by someone who wants disclosure as ‘a certain goal.’ A lofted square ball from none other than Freddie saw their striker rise the highest and head downwards across goal, our keeper who had ran past goal to cover some ground saved, expertly low to his right, keeping the score within touching distance. This doesn’t excuse him for their second goal which he definitely should have saved!
Just as things were starting to look on the up we found ourselves looking down at the ball on the centre spot after having to take another centre kick because Mercury had scored again. A threaded ball through the London Eye of the south east coast Needles split the defence and saw him bearing down at goal. Our keeper was left two on one, to which Freddie, who at this time was burning through the sky, dispatched into his near post bottom corner for his second of the match. Our keeper was now really frustrated, as it was his fault for the second goal, he should have saved it! 1-3.
We had all but given up hope of getting the desired result and heard Freddie singing ‘We are the Champions.’ The match finished and our keeper who should have definitely saved their second goal but couldn’t catch crabs in a Vietnamese brothel was speechless. We had lost to a team that we had already beaten this season and that weren’t as good as us.
This result means that we are out of all cup competitions but can now concentrate all our efforts on the league. This also means that our recent run of form has been killed but ‘who wants to live forever?’
Man of the Match – Sam Marshall – still looking really sharp upfront covered a lot of ground and was quite simply our best player.
BONK of the match – a certain Mr Adam Blackburn – spilled the ball for their second goal. In my defence the rock-hard ball was fizzed in with pace across the face of goal, when I had mud on my gloves, in the wind and the rain, all this as well as being under pressure. The ball slipped under me and into the path of the striker, but where was the defending???
Article by Butters