Match Report

Derby Ams (1) v Matlock Sports (0)

Date: 09/08/08
Team: 1sts
Match Type: League
Venue: Home
Opposition: Matlock Sports

A fresh season, a refreshing performance.

The first starting line up of the season would show the new managers intentions on how he wants to play this season. Our new captain and saviour Morris started as sweeper with sweeper Rich and Brent accompanying. Sam Marshall started where he finished last season on the right wing, the Singo, Chatty Chatty Bang Bang Butler and Colley in central midfield but unfortunately we still had the ageism card to play with OAP Kelvin starting on the left. Up front were Tom and Chavzilla.

The opposition today would be a real tester after their third place finish in the league last season, only missing out on promotion through goal difference. Although who could forget that fateful day last season as we helped the MRA anti-Swainey and overall happy chappy from Willington become league champions after holding todays opposition to a draw, towards the back end of last season.

The match got underway and a more tightly contested spectacle you couldn’t have imagined. Both teams wanting a three point start to the season was obvious, but unfortunately it was Matlock that had the first clear cut chance. A bouncing ball into the box snagged up and struck Brent on the arm. Penalty awarded. Long story short, the penalty didn’t go in, largely due to the agility of the goalkeeper and the Mighty Ams still hadn’t conceded for over 3 calendar months.

Midway through the first half we had the lead through none other than our own Judas, (yeh ill play for you next season boys, only to go and buy a Forest season ticket the following week) Tom Broughton. After clever work down the right hand side from a nameless someone the ball was cut square to Tom who controlled, turned his player and slotted home with his left foot into the bottom corner. 1-0.

Matlock still hadn’t given up the half though as they pressed forward down their left flank, some clever intricate play between three players left their winger with the ball at his feet from just outside the penalty box, he shot hard across goal only to find the left hand of our keeper outstretched to push the ball away from danger.

Half time came and the new manager earned his crust and reinforced the fact that were are a good footballing team and on our day we can compete with the best the league has to offer. If reassurance was food then Dave would serve you a Sunday roast. If it were music he would be DJ Dave, serving you with nothing other than the best tunes of your life. Carling don’t do football managers, but if they did…

With the wind now strongly in their favour, the defence, lead by captain Morris, tactically switched to hold a higher line which proved to be a stroke of genius as often the opposition were left to opting for a long ball which ran through to our keeper who had adopted a higher starting position.

Half way through the second half and that man Ady had broken free from their backline and was bearing down on goal. At any point in the next fifteen seconds he could have shot left footed with only the keeper to beat. He didn’t. But he did do the next best thing, wait until Grant, who was in support, had attracted most of the opposition defence to him like gravity itself, and play a pass behind him, giving him less chance of scoring than Grant already needs to miss.

The only time they did have a clear cut chance that wasn’t deemed offside, it brought out the best of our keeper who with five minutes left on the clock kept the Might Ams lead intact. Their striker latched onto a bouncing ball and on the volley shot into the top corner, our keeper who could have only been a yard and a half away saved and the ball was scrambled over the crossbar bringing the best save of the game and potentially the season out in the first league fixture. In doing so he was clattered by their unyielding striker who in hindsight could probably have gotten out of the way. He doesn’t mind though cause he’s all about the team.

MOTM (we have a new system in the MOTM awards. In past seasons we have always asked the official but from now on it will be up to Dave to assign a player to Man Of The Match as he is manager. Simple, sweat, done) - Sweeper Rich - some say he can only control the ball when its at neck height under pressure from players, others believe that if you put him next do Dibbsy and either Whitaker brother he can actually understand what they are saying (I met this girl right at Maccy D’s, she was miffin, axt me for me digits. I sed yeh right me Julie, you is worse than Cat from Big Brova! Now fall back, or ill egg your ‘ouse woman. Innit!). All we know is he’s damn good.

BONK of the match - Ady Colley - has carried over his BONK winning abilities from last season. In the second half, as he was played through one-on-one with their keeper who was, to say the least, as stationery as a pencil case, with more time on his hands than it took for you to realise that Bruce Willis was actually dead in Sixth Sense, Ady played the ball square to an un-wanting Grant who was swamped with players, when all he had to do was shoot. Useless whore!